Starting new on Facebook after deleting my account. Can it be different this time?
2 years after deleting myself from Meta, I am back on Facebook with a new account. Here's what I've learned in my time away, what I hope will be different, and what seems to have changed since I left.
After declaring I had zero desire to return to Facebook, I’ve rejoined the masses who remain on the platform and I feel I owe an explanation as to why.
So here’s my humble confession that I’m terrible at predicting my own future choices, and a summary of what I hope will come of this decision now that it has been made (though I reserve the right to pull the plug at any point!).
If you’ve left Facebook and are considering returning, this essay is for you. This write up may also be of interest to those of you considering leaving…
Why return to facebook?
Less than a week before my 2 year anniversary of divorcing all things Meta, while overcome with a fever, I caved.
I've not been secretive about the fact that leaving facebook was a mixed bag. And similar to an addict in recovery, even though there were moments when I didn’t think about Facebook, and I got very used to not thinking of life in terms of things to post there, Facebook was ever present in my life. Nearly all of the people in my social circles would talk about it, would tell me how they’re using it, and would tell me about how moderate they were able to be. They talked about the features they enjoyed, and the stuff they were able to stay clear of, saying things like “I’m just there for the pictures of babies and kittens,” or “I just use the groups feature and stay off the feed.”
Even my husband who claims to hate it, is constantly on it because he “has to be” in order to coordinate the shows he produces.
Despite all of this I remained strong in my convictions for a time, however I still used other platforms regularly. Marco Polo, Twitter, Reddit, LinkedIn and Telegram all occupy my mental space. And truth be told, some of them bring out even worse behavior than the gross things I witnessed on Facebook that had inspired me to leave in the first place (I’m looking at you Twitter)!
So whilst sick with a fever and sad about ending 2023 without a celebration, I used the following justifications to pull the trigger on rejoining The social network.
I didn’t quit social media as a whole. I’m still participating. What difference does it really make being off of one platform, when I’m on so many?
Improv (an art form that is a hugely important part of my life!) is coordinated on Facebook: groups for shows, messenger for connecting with out of town theaters. I’ve had to rely on my husband as a middle man for these communications… which is basically using Facebook by proxy.
Craigslist is valueless. Trade of interesting used items happens on Facebook.
What am I hoping for?
Facebook was super fun in the early days. Catching up with old connections. Seeing what people have been up to, who they’ve become over the years. I also enjoyed sharing thoughts as they occurred to me in real time and getting virtual pats on the back just for showing up!
Things have changed significantly since then. For one thing I am of a certain age… and so is nearly everyone I know, which effects the type of communication happening on the platform.
The world has changed too. Generally speaking the overall population has come through the early part of this decade more hesitant to share online and more introverted overall. I’m not the only one fatigued by disagreement, politics and the economy. There are quite simply fewer people on the platform, and a significant percentage of those who are still there seem to fall in greater and greater numbers under the ‘lurker’ category.
Despite all of this I am hoping to utilize Facebook in the following ways.
Groups
Sharing the stuff I do and create
And to communicate with connections in distant locations who are not easy to reach in other ways.
Here’s what I’m hoping to avoid
Political content
Endless time-wasting scrolling
Substituting online interaction for in-person high-value connection time.
In Summary
I’m human too! Wanna follow me on Facebook to see how this second go-round turns out?
For discussion:
What’s your relationship with social media become?
Any insights you’d like to share about Facebook or another social network?
Have you quit and come back?
Leave a comment on this post, or send me a message. I love hearing your point of view!